Happy Teachers Day

“The writer Cynthia Ozick once said, "What we remember from childhood, we remember forever - permanent ghosts, stamped, inked, imprinted, eternally seen."

This TEACHERS DAY let us become the inspiration for our team of teachers to be able to imprint values, ethics, morals and love for lifelong learning in the children we teach.

In the age of technology and super computers, what makes a good teacher? Someone who can make good power points or Google search brilliant lessons or create creative ideas for project work? If this is teaching then computers can do it too, we would not need teachers.

To teach is to touch a life forever. A teacher touches the student for life, whether she teaches for one period, one week or one year.  

A good teacher has personality traits like patience, commitment, dedication, hardworking, creative, happy, ability to resolve problems etc as this will impact the budding personalities of all the children whose lives she touches. A good teacher is well read and continues to read and be abreast to all latest trends both in the classroom and in child development and research. A good teacher must have an understanding about cause and effect, as this will impact her behaviour, choice of words, actions, selection of teaching aids etc. a good teacher must have ‘teacher presence’, she must have the heart to teach. 

 A good teacher is proud to be a teacher and is in the profession because she wants to be teacher and not because she could not qualify for any other profession.

Wishing you a very HAPPY TEACHERS DAY, with these inspiring words from the speech of Ms McAleese, President Of Ireland-

“We get one go around with our kids. Engrave well and their little lives have a chance to blossom as they should. Engrave badly and the scars last a lifetime. You are here because you believe with a passion in getting those early years right. I am here because I want you to know how important your message is, how vital your voices are, how needed your wisdom, expertise and intuition.”

And from Robert Fulgham from his path breaking book, “All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten”, because you and I learned these from our kindergarten teachers and your kids are learning them too.

• Share everything
• Play fair
• Don’t hit people
• Put things back where you found them
• Clean up your own mess
• Don’t take things that aren’t yours
• Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody
• Wash your hands before you eat
• Flush
• Live a balanced life- learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work everyday
• When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, stick together
• Wonder, look.

HAPPY TEACHERS DAY

Twins or terrible two? Triplets or triple trouble? Well, twins and triplets just require effective parenting.

TWINMOM this one is for you……..

Twins and triplets look cute with their similar faces,smiles and clothes. But ask the parents, especially the mother and you will realize twins and triplets mean exhaustion, frustration, tears for the mother. And it starts right from pregnancy.

In his book "Twins 101: 50 Must-Have Tips for Pregnancy through Early Childhood from Doctor M.O.M.," Dr. Khanh-Van Le-Bucklin stresses to parents to aim for Fairness, not equality. And in this simple advice lies the secret of raising twins and triplets.

Most parents aim for equality but things are never equal with twins because they are individuals trapped with the same features and so life long are treated as ‘one’, when they are actually ‘two’. Ask a mother of twins and she will confirm that when one wakes the other feels sleepy. When one is active the other wants food. And so it is a roller coaster ride because one or the other is always wanting your help, attention and support.

Some simple tips for parents with multiple births-

1.    Prepare for life after birth as soon as you know that you will be giving birth to multiples. Think of extra help. Mothers please don’t try to do it on your own, may be possible but in the long run you will break down.

2.    Try not to buy everything similar for the kids. Learn to notice the individuality of each baby and let it blossom. Yes, they are growing up together so will want what the other has, so learn when to give in and when not to.

3.    They will fight for everything and they will be a team against you! Yes expect these extremes, so try and have slightly separate schedules so that you can give your attention equally to both. If not possible then try and give equal attention to both during the activity/every day ritual or you will end up always giving maximum attention to the demanding twin.

4.    Yes, one is always dominant and one is submissive. So early on identify which is which and match your parenting to their temperament.

5.    Give your self atleast 20 minutes a day alone. Impossible only in your mind. Plan and you will achieve it.

6.    No amount of reading will prepare you to be a parent of a twin because the secret is ‘temperament’ it all depends on the temperament of your twins. So learn to recognize and adapt to it right from birth. Remember when parents ‘tamper with temperament’ it leads to ‘tantrums’.

7.    So turn the word twins into an acronym and you will be able to bring some sense into the chaos called twin parenting.

T- TERRIFIC NOT TERRIBLE

Once the shock of knowing that you are having twins wears off, you will soon realize the benefits. You have completed your family in one go, both will grow up together, both will have a sibling and friend and you will soon be free to pursue your dreams as they will both grow up soon and become independent. Yes it means double the cost and responsibility, so plan as soon as you get the news. But stop feeling terrible about it.

W- WIN-WIN FOR ALL

When faced with a choice or a dilemma, choose the option in which everyone wins. To do that you may have to be firm sometimes. But it works.

I-INDIVIDUALITY                                                                        

Treat each twin as in individual or you risk emotional issues in the twins. So try not to have favourites and train yourself to think as per the situation. If both the twins need a separate schedule, do it. If both are happy doing everything together, do it. But don’t let one make the decisions for you.

 

N- NO- AND STICK TO IT

Learn to say NO, and then stick to it. Bawling twins are a handful but once they realize that you are firm, they will adjust to your ways. Don’t be worried to be firm with the naughty one. They have to realize early on that good behaviour will be accepted and incorrect behaviour will not be accepted. They cannot be taught to gain from the other’s behaviour.

S- SHARE YOUR WORK

Twins are not a one person job, so plan and find out who will be with you, always, in their up bringing. Your husband, mother, sister, nanny, baby sitter? Choose wisely and ensure that you don’t divide but share. This means that it should not be that you are always looking after one twin and your partner the other. This will breed sibling rivalry and mean more trouble for you.

In school, please teach the teacher how to identify between the two, so that it is easier on the teacher and boosts the self esteem of the twins as they are not always confused by the teacher. Ideally try not to keep twins in the same class as they will always be compared. And yes if there is no uniform do dress them differently. Let the identity of each child come through, work on ensuring that they are not stuck with the label of ‘twins’.

Hand-Foot-Mouth Disease

This Bulletin is being released to educate and inform the parents on the HAND, FOOT AND MOUTH DISEASE with additional information on how to keep your loved one’s safe. Parents are requested to watch their children and take additional precautions and in case of doubt PLEASE TAKE DOCTOR’S OPINION and if confirmed, PLEASE DO NOT SEND YOUR CHILD TO SCHOOL.

Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease - Children Care Guide

Hand foot - mouth disease is a common childhood illness featuring mouth sores, fever, and a rash.

HFMD is most often caught by children under 10 years old. Children with HFMD usually get a fever first, then red spots with blisters in the middle. HFMD blisters may form in the mouth and on the tongue, hand feet or buttocks.

What does HFMD look like?

HFMD usually starts with a fever of about 37.8 to 38.9’C from 1 to 3 days before spots appear. Your child may have sore throat and may be tired, fussy, and not very hungry. This is the time when your child is most likely to spread the virus to others.

Next, red spots appear that form water - filled blisters in the middle. Blisters may form on your child’s tongue or his mouth. Often, mouth blisters pop and become painful ulcers (sores). Blisters may form on the bottoms of your child’s feet, palms of his hands, or between his fingers or toes. They may also form on your child’s buttocks.

What is the treatment for HFMD?

There is no cure for HFMD. You may treat your child’s discomfort in the following ways:

Treat pain and fever. Ask your child’s doctor what medicines can be given for fever or pain relief of mouth sores. NEVER GIVE YOUR CHILD ANY MEDICATION (LIKE ASPIRIN) WITHOUT CONSULTING DOCTOR FIRST. Giving aspirin to your child when he is ill may cause very serious illness called Reye’s syndrome.

Feed your child soft foods that are not salty, spicy, or tart foods may cause more mouth pain. Offer soft, mild foods like yogurt, pudding, milkshakes, mashed potatoes or applesauce. Try to help your child drink as much water, milk and clear liquids as possible. To make drinking easier, serve your child cool and room temperature drinks. Have you child drink from a straw if he has sores on his lips or tongue. Serve drinks in a cup, since sucking from a bottle could be painful.

Provide relief for mouth sores and ulcers. You may try using numbing gels from the drug store. Ask your doctor about an antacid solution to help your child’s mouth sores feel better.

How do I keep others from catching HFMD? 

Wash your hands often. Wash your hands and child’s hands after changing diapers or wiping after BM. Wash hands before working in the kitchen and especially after caring for your child with HFMD. Make sure all your children wash their hands before eating and after going to the bathroom. Hands should also be washed after wiping off saliva (spit) or nose drippings. 

Do not share food or personal items. Do not share cups or eat from the same bowls, plates or utensils. Do not take a bite out of the same food. Do not share toothbrushes. 

Tell others that they have been exposed. Contact your child’s school or daycare center. Tell them that your child’s classmates may have been exposed to HFMD. 

Keep your child away from others while he has a fever or feels ill. Your child may return to school after his fever is gone and he does not feel sick anymore. Also, the red blisters should be dry and crusted over. 

Do not let your child share toys or give kisses while he or she infected. 

Wear latex or rubber gloves when you apply any lotion, cream or ointment to your child’s blisters.

The new rage among adolescents, motor bike stunts

Rash driving- it is important to understand that when youngsters are indulging in rash and illegal driving then the elements involved are not only rashness but also recklessness, a thrill of adrenalin, excitement, the need to be ‘faster’ or the need for speed, and of course peer imitation, ‘others are doing it why not me?’. Worse still is knocking down someone and not stopping to help or even feeling remorseful about it.

What does all the above say about the mindset and personalities of our young generation? Let’s understand each one-

Recklessness- is part of taking risks, but one must know good risks and bad risks. And for kids to know the difference we need to nurture logical intelligence. Risk management is an important skill that can be part of education both in schools and at home. A simple exercise for risk management which you can start as young as  age 5 is asking hypothetical questions to children and then understanding their mindsets with their answers and moulding their way of thinking by showing them the pros and cons. Try questions like what if clouds had strings? You will notice , the answers you will first receive will all be positive and almost selfish in nature like we can swing on them, we can pull the clouds towards ourselves we can, take a cloud along like a balloon, etc.  After  eliciting these answers you then need to focus your kid’s  attention by asking queries like,   ‘some people will take all the clouds above them and get all the rain, is that right?’. ‘What would happen to birds if clouds had strings?’ ‘What would happen to aeroplanes if clouds had strings?’    Now end the exercise by asking, ‘Should clouds have strings?’

 An exercise in thinking like the above helps develop the logical intelligence, the individual learns to look at both the pros and cons and not get carried away only with the pros. This should start from childhood.

A thrill of adrenalin or excitement- this means that maybe the everyday activities of the child are boring and lack excitement and that is why they search out such activities that give them that rush and surge of doing something. Good chance for both parents and educationists to look within.

Being faster, well can we blame the youngsters? - Speed is something that we praise in children and we are constantly goading children to be faster, first etc. Hence the concept of speed gets ingrained quite early in life in a child’s mind as synonymous to success. Rarely do they associate speed with danger. Also as much as it is parents responsibility that they do not allow their young children to drive or buy them a car etc it is equally the responsibility of the media and the bike  companies to see that their product is not incorrectly portrayed to young impressionable minds. Look at all the television ads of all leading motorbikes or cars; each one is showing off stunts, racing, taking risks. These are bikes and cars  that will actually be used on roads with potholes and at a speed not more than 30 kms an hour and even less keeping in mind the traffic in most places, but see their ads, they are zooming, performing stunts and motivating the young buyer to try it out. In this initiative against rash driving why don’t we send a rose to each of these bike and car companies and each of the ad companies that made the ad and make them realise their responsibility towards society, if nothing else they should think of it as their corporate social responsibility.

They feel a sense of immense confidence when they race or drive recklessly- Adolescence is a phase that requires constant booster doses of confidence building. But sadly at that stage the adolescent has the maximum stress of performance and physically they are going through a ‘gangly’ stage.  Emotionally also they lack the confidence. What adds to it is when parents and teachers are also more critical and use ‘put me down language’. Boost the young adult’s confidence, show him/her success in activities that he/she is good at and surely instances of young adults seeking confidence boosters from such rash activities would go down.

Peer imitation- parents need to be extremely conscious about who the youngster is friendly with, call them home, meet them and then discuss with your youngster if you notice some mindsets in their  friends which are completely different from that of your family. Don’t stop them from meeting such varied mindsets but make your youngster understand that to be successful in life it is not always beneficial to conform and imitate, to be a leader one must be able to stand differently and successfully. Also important here is that children should grow up seeing and hearing you talk about your heroes, your role model and then help them seek out their hero and role model. Till childhood most boys look up to superman and spider man but what happens in adolescent, who is their role model?

What does it tell us when such youngsters race and knock down someone and do not even stop to help? When the upbringing of children lacks enough of emphasis on empathy development and conscience development then as youngsters they will be ruthless and uncaring. Both the home and educational institutions must consciously develop this otherwise we are headed for a very mean, selfish and uncaring society.

So who is to blame for this reckless driving? R.T.O for giving licenses? Cops that turn a blind eye when they see an underage driving? Parents who gift their underage children a vehicle too soon? Or friends and media? The answer is truly in the famous African proverb- ‘It Takes a Village to Raise a Child’. Yes, ‘It Takes A Community To Raise A Youngster’. So his friends, your friends, his peer group, the magazines and TV channels that he watches, the police, the government are all responsible.  They all contribute to your child’s mindset. Where do we begin? Charity begins for each one of the above at home. Let’s stop blaming, finding faults, let the change begin.

And yes a final word of caution, please do not sit your young toddler on your lap when you are driving, think about it, are you not sowing the seeds of ‘too fast, too soon’? Better be safe than sorry.

Poison in your child’s creative materials

Be it crayons, pencils, felt pens, play dough, paints or scissors it is very essential to select those that not only fit in your budget but more importantly are child friendly and safe. Young children are susceptible to toxins in paints or lead poisoning through cheap paints and plastics. This can lead to allergies, asthma, and severe problems like attention disorders and behaviour issues due to high content of lead.

While selecting crayons-

• For very young toddlers select those that are thick and round and fit in the palm as young toddlers use the ‘palmer’ grip to hold a crayon.
• Then the child can progress to thick crayons, also called Jumbo crayons.
• As the child slowly masters the skill of colouring you can now give 3 sided crayons, so that it automatically teaches the child the right way to hold the crayon and this will later help him in holding a pencil.
• Crayons should be such that they do not break easily, as this can be frustrating for the child.
• Children tend to put everything in their mouth and may even bite it and swallow-so always select crayons made from food grade colours and avoid those made from textile dyes-as these are dangerous for children when swallowed.
• The wrapper should be of the same colour as the tip as this helps your child select the colour all by himself and hence develops independence and self esteem.
• After colouring the colour should not stain the other pages.
• When colouring the child should be able to get an even flow and not a patchy print.

While selecting scissors-

It is very important to give cutting with scissors as a pre-writing activity as the same three fingers that are used in holding a pencil are used for holding the scissor and hence this helps develop them.

• The concept of scissoring is to develop the ‘writing fingers’ (thumb, fore finger and middle finger) so the finger holes should be such that they can comfortably accommodate the thumb on one side and both the fore and middle finger in the other.
• It should be sharp enough for cutting and blunt enough not to hurt the child.
• Try rubbing the blades on your palms to check if they hurt.
• It should not twist or get stuck while using as this frustrates the child.

While selecting a felt pen-

• Do not go on the size or thickness of the pen, check the length of the inside ink holder.
• It should use food grade ink so that it is safe even if children put it in their mouth.
• The cap should be ventilated as this will help the child breathe in case he swallows it.
• The tip should be comfortable-not too short or too thin.
• The ink should be such that it can be washed off easily from the child’s hands.

While choosing pencils-

• Check the cantering of the lead-it should be exactly in the centre or else the pencil point will keep breaking while writing and while sharpening.
• So avoid those pencils where the back of the pencil is covered with paint. The back of the pencil should be showing the lead point.
• Go more for utility rather than its colour or price.
• Safe lead or non lead pencils are the best.

While choosing an eraser-

·         Avoid those with aromas as many kids may be allergic to them. Some cheap varieties have strong aromas.

·         ‘Dust free’ erasers are best for young kids.

·         Ensure that the eraser does not smudge or leave dark marks every time the child uses it.

·         The eraser should be the right size for the young fingers to hold and move.

·         The eraser quality should be such that with the slightest of movement across the paper it should be able to erase, so that kids do not need to put pressure.

While choosing play dough/clay-

·         The play clay should be soft and malleable for young fingers.

·         It should not have any sticky oil etc on its surface.

·         When kids use it there should be no residue on their fingers.

·         It should not stain or bleed colours.

·         It should be soft so that it does not crack or dry up when stored.

·         It should be of a high grade so that it does not catch fungus when stored.

·         It should be non toxic for kids. Check for lead content.

While choosing paints-

·         Avoid paints that give a strong chemical smell.

·         Paints that leave stains on the fingers are of low grade quality, best avoided.

·         Buy larger containers so that it lasts longer.

·         Paints should be non toxic, check for lead content.

The Navratnas of Parenting

Stress has become an integral part of our lives. Parents particularly are stressed out and frazzled! 

Why? A parent has plenty to deal with- house work, office, targets, household staff, children, husband/wife, the whole family and friends who ridicule you for becoming ant-social due to lack of time and the constant stress of raising a child who is exposed to multifarious activities and also a successful one. To top it all it’s an age of wanting to do your finest, but it becomes a challenge when you have a tough and express way of life, like nowadays. Although parents do have more conveniences to support their lifestyles with the washing machine, the refrigerator, the microwave, school buses, technologies, house help, chauffeurs - but these come with their own share of nuisances!

As you realise now, one indeed needs to be a ‘super parent’ to be able to bring up a happy, confident kid and yet remain fit, sane and happy themselves. A little imbalance and it will throw a parent off, causing stress. So, what is the ‘stress’ in parenting? Well, there is the typical and common stress that is part of the role, such as homework, the school bus, the cold and cough, the stains and tears and all the office work on top of it all. But, that’s what every parent signed up for, isn’t it!

On the other hand, stress that parents need to watch out for and weed out is the ‘negative stress’. For this, parents need to remove ‘guilt’ from their parenting style. Guilt gives rise to an imbalance in the mind and forcing you to make wrong decisions unknowingly such as bribing and bartering with children or end up battering them.

The antidote for cognisant and wise parenting is to ‘keep the guilt and bad stress away’! How do we do that? It’s simple. Believe, enjoy and understand the hidden secret of parenting- The secret of the Navratnas of parenting.

The government of New Zealand has a policy document called Te Whariki, which has nine aspects that needs to be involved in the care, growth, nurturing and education of children. I have adapted these for parenting and called them the ‘Navratnas of Parenting’. Practise these and watch the stress of parenting dissolve into an art and parenting will be pleasurable not painful.

1.     Empowerment

For Your Kids - Empower children by letting them to talk, discuss and logically argue. It is healthy, encourage it. Teaching them to keep quiet is only bottling their emotions.

For You - Parents should empower themselves first by not getting caught in mindless competition with other parents and then empower children with the confidence that I am with you, come what may. This will give children a sense of trust and abundance.

2.     Holistic development

For Your Kids - Children need you to take care of their life skills and not only academic skills. They need, love, food, understanding, attention, patience, rules and sometimes a friend in you. When you are stressed about one, take a deep breath and focus on the other.

For You - Parents should focus on all needs. Their interactions with children should not only be limited to conversations about marks and exams. Be firm about food rules and sleep rules.

3.     Family and community

For Your Kids - Family, neighbours, friends, teachers are all part of your child’s family and community. Let your child see you interacting with them, children learn from what they see, they imitate what you do.

For You - Involve family and community and take help when necessary. No grand parents? Well take a favour from a good neighbour and ask them to baby sit while you take a break. A good break rejuvenates the mind

4.      Relationships

For Your Kids - Your child will have a different relationship with siblings, grand parents, friends etc. Don’t define or control these. Don’t be the point of contact for your child, don’t micro manage your child’s relationships. When you do that you are inviting stress. Accept your child’s relationship with others. Don’t feel insecure if your child is closer to a grandparent or someone else. When a parent is secure, it brings a sense of security within a child.

For You - Parents must have good relations with each other and the family as this will reflect on the child. Nurture relationships. Family ties decide the emotional strength of an individual.

                                          

5.     Well being

For your kids - Kids need to be safe and secure and should know that they can approach you about their fears. They should know that they will not be shouted at, ridiculed or laughed at about their fears.

For you - Your duty is not just to give them the latest, technology and fashion but also the safety and security of their overall well being. Look out for your child.

6.     Belonging

For Your Kids - When we belong, we care, when we care, we love and when we love, we can protect and defend and stand up for or fight for what we love.  Let children belong to themselves first. Don’t try and control every emotion. Don’t micro-manage your kids. Give them the freedom to take decisions.

For You- Bring belonging in your parenting. Discuss with your spouse or partner, make decisions for your kids together. Never argue or differ in front of the kids, do it in private. Belong to your kids, even in rough times. Don’t give up on yourself or them.

7.     Contribution

For Your Kids - Teach children about what they can give and not only about what they can get. Consciously teach kids that contribution can be in the form of a smile, a hug or some help. It does not have to be a materialistic contribution.

For You- Don’t only contribute laptops or holidays abroad for your children. Contribute your time and effort, so that kids can have the right development and learning. Quality time can be just 20 minutes a day, spent fully focussed on your child, no distractions.

8.     Communication

For Your Kids - Teach children that there are many ways to communicate their feelings and needs. Be open to your child’s way of communication, each child is unique. Teach your child which communication style will get your attention the most. Which means positive styles of communication will be nurtured in your child.

For You - Learn to laugh, smile, giggle tell stories, make gestures, wiggle your eyebrows, furrow your brow or hug. Learn ways to communicate with your child. Be a fun parent!

9.     Exploration

For your kids - Children are born explorers and they love exploring your limits! Set boundaries, set limits, but at the same time ensure that you give them choices too. This will help them explore their potential.

For you - Explore different ways of dealing with your child. One size never fits all! Try different approaches in stressful situations and yes, change your parenting style as per the age of your child. Trying being in a child’s shoes, after all we were all their once!