Tuesday 25 November 2014

Italian your parenting


Italian your parenting

All parents are interested in the progress and development of their children and to do it correctly they need pointers to guide them to the right path. Parenting can be pleasurable if it is simple and research based. Just like food is nourishment for the body, parenting is nourishment for the mind, body, and soul. Just like we eat different types of food- Guajarati, Chinese, Italian, Punjabi etc., similarly parenting too can be of different flavors. So how about Italian? Let us Italian your parenting!

Two of the most globally famous early childhood educational practices were born in Italy- Montessori and Reggio Emilia. In Reggio Emilia there is a wonderful poem called ‘The Hundred Languages of Children’. This poem talks about how all children have a hundred languages, but we the people, parents, schools, and society, steal the ninety nine and tell the child that there is only one language. We want all kids to learn, behave, speak, feel, and perform in the same manner. We have lost touch with the concept of individualism. In parenting too we try to ensure that all our kids are the same. They should walk at the same age, look the same, and perform similarly in tests. Let us give them the hundred languages and let them grow as individuals and not clones.

Italy is known as the land of pizza but it should be called the land of the Piazza. Every city is dotted with Piazzas, these are kind of squares in different parts of the city where people sit, chat, drink coffee, tea, or lick ice-cream cones and kids can play, elders can walk and youngsters can cycle.  We need these spaces in our cities and homes, little piazzas so that children learn about social development and community spirit face-to-face and not only on Facebook.

We are so obsessed with ‘branded stuff’ and the English language. In fact now many children are made to learn Chinese, Japanese, before they learn their mother tongue. But in Italy and in most European countries, children learn their mother tongue for the first few years. Italian children are proud and confident in their Italian. In India our kids are burdened to learn a foreign language before they even speak their mother tongue. Let us also help our children be proud of their roots before we give them wings. Every street in Italy has Louis Vuitton stores, one of the most expensive and fashionable brands in the world. In India Louis Vuitton has become a ‘class’ symbol whereas in Italy it was a mere fashion statement. Isn’t that how all fashion should be?

Children in Italian schools are given many opportunities to draw, paint, create, and that is indeed natural. After all this is the land of Michael Angelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Raphael and many others. This is seen in the architecture and paintings around Italy. You are automatically forced to use words like gigantic, mammoth, awe inspiring, intricate, mind boggling, impressive, as words less than these would fail to describe the architectural genius that you see in the buildings. The presence of fountains in each city helps you understand how architecture was used to create spaces where people can mingle, sit and hear sounds that are soothing and close to nature. I wish today’s architects around the world would get over their obsession with steel and glass. No wonder our children’s vocabulary is limited to tall, shining, and awesome (sic). 

Robotics is commonly used in most Italian schools to teach Math, Science and concepts but this has not replaced art education in the schools. Leonardo Da Vinci was a painter and inventor similarly education that we choose for our children should be about the expressive arts and intelligence fused together. It should not be either/or but the best of both that should inspire our children.
Pinocchio, one of the most path breaking stories for young children was also born in Italy. At a basic level, moral learnings are abundant in this wonderful story that every child should be exposed to. If you will tell a lie, your nose will grow longer! What a wonderful way to teach children about moral values and ethics. The Disney version has a song, ‘Let your conscience be your guide’. That should be the anthem of every child. Enjoy Pinocchio with your child today…both the book and the Disney version.

We cringe when we are with our children and see a naked picture of the human body but we swing along with them on vulgar lyrics that ogle and comment on women and sex. We need to give our children a balance. Ancient Italian architecture and paintings help children grow up with a positive concept of the human body. The statue of David is indeed a reminder that children should grow up viewing and revering the naked human body rather than learning about it as vulgar and porn. We have similar sculptures and paintings in India like the Sun Temple at Konark or certain select paintings of Raja Ravi Varma that help us give our children a positive and moral outlook towards our bodies, how babies are born etc.

And here are some great parenting tips from an amazing Professor from Italy, Daniela Lucangeli Padua University.  She says children have selective attention. They know what to focus on and when to switch off. Parents are always worried about the fact that their children do not listen to them. Well find out what gets your child’s selective attention, and then use it to ensure that your children listen too and hear you. She spoke about the amygdala in the brain and emotions that accompany learning. So aptly put by her that the emotion that should accompany learning should be curiosity and not fear. So we need to stop threatening children to make them perform or complete their tasks or homework as it is directly affecting their brain development. She quoted Eric Fisher on how rage and fear does not damage learning and creativity as much as boredom does. When we drone on and on with our children, they get bored. When we hold their hands and make them do their homework, they get bored. When we feed them with our hands instead of letting them feed themselves, they get bored. When we make them wear their clothes, tie their shoes, do their beds…they get bored. Their boredom all day long affects their learning and creativity. So if you want your kids to perform better at school, stop boring them!
They say beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.  I would like to add that parenting inspirations are in every city and country, if we only look at them from the point of view of children and their hundred languages.






37 comments:

Unknown said...

We, as parents are very protective of our offspring and thus do not give them freedom as we feel secured if the children are dependent on us. The author has very clearly explained that children should be curious to learn new things, but not with fear.

It has been very clearly explained that every country has its own parenting techniques, which only needs to be observed and incorporated.

Unknown said...

The idea of finding out the selective attention of our children and to use it to make them listen to us, is a wonderful tip by the blogger which many of us as parents should imbibe in us.

shilpa said...
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shilpa said...

Best Parenting- Allowing them to creat and do things on their own interest and we behind to support with care, which we at first don't allow saying no dear you will not be able well put in the article.Good learning in this, how to handle and make them independent.Last line of 100 language always we come across good to have more knowledge from the article.

PJK Vadgaon said...
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Anonymous said...

Great introspection...regarding using the regional language for 1st few years..
adding different ways of learning for our children to learn and adapt better...
Openness and distinction to what are children are exposed tooo..
maybe unknowingly at times a parent introduces children to that they would not understand leaves what impact...so a close thought and choice for every child should be on priority list.
Thanks once again maam..for introducing the selective way to us parents.

Unknown said...

Parents should believe in their child and help them to be independent and supportive when ever required.Its important for them to know understand and look at them from their point of view and know their hundred languages.

Unknown said...

An article which bring forward to us the importance of mother tongue ,it is also a guideline for methodology which could be helpful for the children .Parents should believe in making their children independent and support them only when required

Abhaya K- PJK Bangalore-1 said...

We create rules and regulations and make the kids to follow it in their learning process, instead of creating space for them for their natural learning.We forget that kids have their own outlook about the world. We should provide them facilities to explore their ideas.

Sonali Karmakar said...

I totally agree to what you say maam. As a parent I always see to it that I converse in my mother tongue as well as in our national language Hindi with my child also at the same time I do converse in English. However, I have never forced my child to speak only in English which most of the parents do. As a parent we must give space to our children to adapt all the languages simultaneously. Very rightly said children have hundred languages so we must not steal those ninety nine languages from them and let them grow as an individual not clones.

namrata singh said...

We as a parents have become very protective for our kids.We should help our children to grow up as an individual.We as parents need to leave the kids to explore.

Uma Nagdeo said...

it is very important for child to first learn his mother tongue rather than any other foreign language so that freedom of expression is not lost very well said children should be proud of their roots before we give them wings. Present scenario is such many parents are unknowingly harming their child by not providing them the required freedom even in their daily task which makes children dependent on parent and ultimately this is how we are boring them and their learning is affected. so this blog is great learning for all the parents to use proper parenting style for proper development and progress of the child.

Ankita Suchak said...

Ma`am,very well said that in initial years we must let our children learn their mother tongue.Also we as a parent & teachers must understand the 100 languages of children.
We must stop threatening the children as it affects the brain development.We should develop curiosity & child should be self motivated to do the things.

PJK,Nigdi said...

Thank you Ma'am for the wonderful parenting article.children should get opportunities to draw,paint etc.
then learning will not be boredom for them.

Uma Wagh PJK Jalgaon said...

Ma'am saw Piazza in wikipedia, really very good concept.

Children must have many ways & opportunities to express themselves, hand on experience should be given to children .

Unknown said...

Here the author says,let us not support the children by holding hand at each level of learning,instead provide them an opportunity to explore and experiment which makes the learning full circle.

Unknown said...

Variety is the spice of life so we are eagerly awaiting your next article to spice up our knowledge of parenting. Ma'am you have rightly said that there is no 'degree' or 'diploma' which is compulsory to obtain before becoming parents, hence most parents are unequipped for the colossal and extremely difficult and important role of parenting. We thank you for your articles which inform and guide parents so beautifully.

Unknown said...

It's very true ma'am that every child and every individual has to be proud of it mother tongue also every child should be independent so they learn in a better way.

jayshree shah said...

Parenting tips i feel every parent should be given before a child is born to both the parents so they understand how to bring up children in correct manner.
Many points to learn from your article the best i liked is Let us give them the hundred languages and let them grow as individuals and not clones.Let's think and insure ourselves against unknowingly harming the child.
as i have learned from you
"It takes a village to raise a child"

Unknown said...

I Tanvi Mody teacher of PJK Plus VileParle feels it is important for every child to know their mother tongue.It is also important to see the interest of child and help them to explore by their own.

Unknown said...

Yes Ma'am, very true that now a days parents are forcing children to learn English or other foreign language rather than teaching mother tongue.We as adult must give kids that much of space and freedom that they can explore all hundred languages and not steal ninety nine.

Unknown said...

Thank you ma'am for once again sharing with us this wonderful article.We as a parent & teacher should give our children ample opportunity to explore themselves in multiple ways,which can be in a fun way method.

Unknown said...

I Mrs Naushin Sayed teacher of PJK Plus Vile Parle feel that if parents intersperse children in learning different languages then they will not be able to learn mother tongue,If they stop threatening the children ,it will be more visible to chidren complete their task.It will be intractable to deal with children ,when we glance in child life it is full of Inspiration,Expressive art and Intelligence.

Vinod said...

I do appreciate and respect all views. Mainly the following that rang on my head:-

1. Importance of Mother Tongue:- We had started talking to our son in English so that he gets used to it... now he is not ready to talk any other language. So we have a Tamil day every week and a Hindi day on another. Must be sounding cliche... but this is what I had to try than forcing him.

2. Fear and creating Fear is a traditional issue. Will take some time to get out of that.

3. On human anatomy, we generally ignore than appreciate or scorn. It is what it is. Thats all! We do not need to teach children to appreciate. They will learn it automatically.

4. Like the way we are obsessed with English lang. So are we with Western culture. What we learn from this article is that we need to be proud of our culture and educate our children on it, rather than calling it a (pseudo)secular. I know opinions might starkly differ. But I respect them.

What is similar?
a. Our children draw on walls... and then learn later...
b. Our culture has a lot of paintings
c. Importance to mother tongue
d. Primitive education method was more practical and without books.

5.

Unknown said...

I Ms. Poonam Borade teacher of PJK Plus Vile Parle thank you ma’am for sharing such interesting parenting article. Actually as you said parenting is nourishment for the mind, body & soul. I feel we should give more opportunities to kids for learning as well as we all should be proud to our mother tongue and national language.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

I Ms. Janice Gomes teacher at Pjk plus Vile Parle agree to what you said Ma'am. We need to give the kids the time and space to learn their mother tongue first or the language the child is comfortable in.kids shouldn't be threatened to make them learn instead we need to handle then aptly.

Unknown said...

Truly said in this article by Ma'am.In our country children are burdened to learn foreign language especially English before they properly learn their mother tongue.Even kids are not exposed to natural play like playing with mud,sand etc.

Unknown said...

Thank you ma'am for yet another inspiring article. Well said, learning should involve curiosity and not fear. Lets create opportunities for children to explore and grow independently.

Jumbo Kids, Chakan said...

I liked the great parenting tips given by Professor Daniela Lucangeli.It would be of great help in improving our kids to perform better.We always choose for our children and don't give opportunities to do things on their own.They really get bored when we do things for them.

CA Swati Dhannawat said...

Thank you mam for this parenting article,, we as parent should not burden the kids to learn what we want them to learn or adapt, they should be taught of being themselves and grow independently.

Unknown said...

As an educator, I always see to it that I converse in my mother tongue as well as in our national language Hindi with my child also at the same time I do converse in English. However, I have never forced my child to speak only in English which most of the parents do. Very rightly said children have hundred languages so we must not steal those ninety nine languages from them.

Unknown said...

We as an adult should not burden the kids with our rules and philosophies .They should be allowed to grow independently so that they can learn in the way they want. We should educate our kids to be proud of their culture and mother tongue rather than just focusing on foreign culture.

PJK Vadgaon said...

I totally agree as a parents we must give space to our children to adapt all the languages.

Anonymous said...

When I was reading this blog I felt like we are working as computer whatever comes is stored. Where as we need to be like our digestive system to take best for our body and rest throw away. I feel parenting if connected to digestive system which is collapsed one. As Italy is place of painting but we take pizza...

Unknown said...

In a Montessori environment, a child can work on what they are doing for as long as they wish.
Montessori education in india|Montessori teacher training