If D.A.P is so important then why is it sparingly noticeable in Indian preschools?

N.C.E.R.T and N.C.T.E do talk about D.A.P and promote it on their websites and seminars but yet the emphasis is strongly on rigorous academics and rote learning and drill activity in preschools as preschools in most states of India are viewed as a preparatory and introductory stage for primary school. So the emphasis is on ensuring that the child is able to write sentences, do addition and subtraction (some schools even teach 5 year olds multiplication and division) answer general knowledge questions and come out with flying colours in formal interview sessions! 

I think the problem is when we refer to these years as preschool or pre primary- so the lopsided emphasis is that it is a school that is before the primary school, so naturally it is meant to prepare a child for primary school! Whereas actually the kindergarten years are to prepare a child for life, living and learning. Sadly we only prepare them for learning and that too the incorrect kind!

How can this scenario change? what I am about to suggest may cause a storm and open a hornet’s nest but if a debate on this can be sparked and lead to change in the kindergarten years, then I don’t mind opening the proverbial Pandora’s box- 

1.             Tie up pre primary with the primary syllabus, which means instead of the primary especially the standard one dictating to the kindergarten about what each child should be able to do before stepping into standard one, it should be the other way around, let the kindergarten give the primary school, where to start from.

2.             Kindergarten and even primary curriculum usually do not feature in the curriculum definitions of educational boards, but I think if educational boards joined in by specifying what should and should not be taught to primary and kindergarten years then schools would be ‘able to’ implement D.A.P. easily and effectively.

3.             D.A.P can serve as that proverbial bridge that will take the child smoothly from ‘pre primary’ to primary and beyond.

4.             We also need to give a better status to kindergarten, as they are functioning with underpaid adults who lack professional and specialized educational qualifications.

5.             Teachers need to be better qualified so that they will be able to understand their role instead of functioning as ‘powerless’ people just implementing and inflicting incorrect practices on little children.

6.             (The more time young children spend in poor quality settings the lower they score on measures of cognitive and social skills(n.a.e.y.c early child care research network 2000,2003)

7.             Involve doctors and other professionals in driving home the message.

8.             Talk to schools about maturation, and experience

9.             Prepare parents and children for the primary school transition.

10.          More purposeful advocacy for kindergarten must talk about its strengths and potential research based contributions to children.

11.          Kindergarten movement needs a clarity of purpose otherwise there is huge risk of this movement being swept aside or blown off its course by the storms of change raging in educational establishments.

12.          Let the change in educational norms, methods and goals begin with kindergarten  - Kindergarten Is Too Important Not To Protect And Nurture So, Lets Protect Kindergarten And Childhood With D.A.P.(naeyc)

13.          Why do we still stick to the 4 line books for pre primary when the goal is to make the child write on single lines? Three lines will serve the purpose better. Then why put the children through the process of unlearning and learning?

14.          Why cursive writing for pre schoolers? First teach them print and the move to cursive writing in the primary years. When 99% of reading that he is  exposed to is in print? After all to write he must first read and he reads in print

                                    

Some more points to ponder…….

Frankly speaking children require five skills in life that is the core of education, the five skills are –

1.   Physical Skills

2.   Communicative Skills

3.   Social Skills

4.   Emotional Skills

5.   Intellectual Skills

                                                             

When parents and schools only stress on the learning of the 3 R’s or academics, only the 5^th skill is being developed, so what about the other 4 skills will they not be important in life? They are extremely important and maybe this misplaced focus on only one skill is the real reason why this generation is not as adaptive, emotionally strong and able to relate, unlearn and learn in their life work. 

It’s high time we educate parents on how schools should educate their kids! 

There is no such thing as ‘discipline’; it is behavior management or modification.

There is no such thing as ‘discipline’; it is behavior management or modification. Because discipline is fixed, like in the army, but behavior can vary and with it varies the methods of handling deviant behavior. The problem is that as adults we follow a strict policy with kids that says,’ Do as we say, not as we do’, and we forget that kids learn by imitation! So you can see mothers and teachers shouting at their kids and asking them to ‘be quiet’!

Yet another myth- Patience. You can’t have patience with kids, should not have, as there is no such thing as patience. Patience implies that you are ‘bearing with’ someone, instead of basing your discipline on patience base it on understanding. Because in patience you will control the child instead of guiding the child. So stop telling yourself, I need to be patient with my child, instead say have I understood what the child is actually trying to tell me with the behavior? Usually kids have lots to tell you, but do not have the supportive language development and so their boredom, frustration, anger comes out in behavioral problems. Show them a socially accepted avenue to show their anger and frustration, don’t stop them from experiencing these emotions, use sentences like,’ I know you are angry because I did not give you the toy, but instead of beating me, you can beat the pillow’.

Don’t react to kids misbehavior with your own, oh yes it happens. Let me tell you about this mother and child I watched at the check in  terminal of an airport (the best place that I watch kids interact with their parents!) a mother sitting in front of me had her 3 year old son sitting facing her on her lap. Both of them were engrossed in a beautiful interaction and bonding by singing nursery rhymes that the child must have learnt in his playschool. The mother’s mobile phone rang and mid sentence she picked up her cell and started talking to the other person. I could see the child’s face was disappointed, but the child waited patiently for a full minute( long time in a toddler’s world!) then started nudging the mother, ‘mummy’, ‘mummy’, mummy’ he went on quietly and patiently. No response from mummy, she was happily ignoring the child and chatting on the phone. Exasperated and irritated the child caught hold of the mothers chin and said, ‘mummy chalo na’, mummy just shook her head and carried on, to which; to my utter amazement the child slapped the mother! In reaction to which, to my utter horror, the mother slapped the child and the child starting bawling. Mother embarrassed, switched off the phone, and started cajoling the child, ‘I am so sorry beta’ etc etc out of guilt and embarrassment. The child refused to stop crying only increased the octaves of screaming! She bought a chocolate for the child and pacified the child.

So what went wrong in this beautiful interaction that was on between mother and child? How did a lovely singing bond end in this ‘free for all’?

Simple, the mother did not show respect for the child, when the mobile phone rang she should have either completed the song that they were singing and then picked up the phone or should have excused herself and told the child, I will take this call and then we will continue. And she should have known to recognize the signs of ‘final frustration’ that kids exhibit, which is ‘holding your chin and making you look at them’, when kids do this, they are serious, serious about throwing a full blown tantrum! Final mistake she made she answered a slap with a slap, isn’t that ‘do as we say and not as we do’? if we are telling kids that they must not hit when they are angry, then how can we hit when we are angry? And then buying a chocolate to pacify the child? Materialistic parenting, a no-no for healthy development of kids.

So respect children and watch for the impeding signs of tantrums and misbehavior. Catch them being good instead of punish them when bad.

Children in the first 6 years lack impulse control, which is why without thinking the little boy slapped his mother. Impulse control comes with the development of the pre frontal cortex, so the more the prefrontal cortex develops, the better will be the logic, reasoning, attention, focus in children. Play games to develop impulse control, simple games like ‘Simon says’, ‘red light, green light’, all develop impulse control. For example in ‘Simon says’, the child has to concentrate and wait for the word ‘Simon’ to do the action, so he controls his impulse to do the action, until he hears the word.

Punishment is a strict no-no. that is a traditional method, we need guidance, show the child where he went wrong and what he should have done instead- The difference between the two approaches is that traditional discipline criticizes children- often publicly- for unacceptable behaviors whereas guidance teaches children positive alternatives, what they can do instead.  

In today’s world teachers and mothers need to be leaders and not bosses. In Piaget’s words they must work for the goal of ‘autonomy’ (intelligent and ethical decision making) rather than obedience

According to behavioural expert and author ANNE COPLEY there are four zones that you should look out for in kid’s behaviour-

1.    Safe zone- when children feel wanted, secure, loved, their needs are met, they function in a safe zone and such children are happy, well adjusted and well behaved.

2.    Learning zone- when children experience safe zone, they are able to learn, explore, be creative, make decisions, choose, focus and this is the learning zone, they will be smarter and learn more.

3.    Anxiety zone- children who do not feel safe, secure, wanted and reassured are in the anxiety zone. Anxiety leads to irritation, frustration and anger. It is in this zone that they will start sending out signs and signals that tell you they are about to ‘let all hell loose’!

4.    Stress zone – when you are unable to read those signs and give them the required reassurance, help, guidance, they move into the stress zone, where all hell breaks loose.

It takes a lot of effort, learning, unlearning, guidance, love, time to bring a child from the stress zone to the safe zone. So ideally keep them in the safe and learning zone and never reach the anxiety zone.

Adults should remember that children do not misbehave we misinterpret their behaviour.

Why Should Children Not Be Interviewed

Are they applying for a job? If the answer is NO then why should we interview them?

In fact parents should be interviewing the school to find out whether the school will be suitable for their child.

 Does this kind of interviewing harm children?

Yes it does.

 First it creates a stress in the parent, the stress of ‘performance’ that my child must not fail. And so in their anxiety parents end up putting undue pressure on the child, start getting irritated with the child, get tense, worried and end up completely ‘anxiety ridden’

 Having an adult in this frame of mind especially an adult that is your mother or father can cause undue damage to the child’s emotional development and brain development. It can also harm the child’s social development.

 Let’s understand the emotional damage-

So what are the emotional development stages or growth that a preschooler goes through?

AGE	STAGE	STRENGTH DEVELOPED
0 TO 1 YEARS	TRUST V/S MISTRUST	HOPE
2 TO 3 YEARS	AUTONOMY V/S SHAME AND DOUBT	WILL POWER
4 TO 5 YEARS	INITIATIVE V/S GUILT	PURPOSE
6 TO 12 YEARS	INDUSTRY V/S INFERIORITY	COMPETENCE

As you can see above, most children of the age from 2 to 6 years are being interviewed and that is the age when hope, willpower, purpose and confidence are developed in the child.

So when you interview a 2 to 3 year old and the child  is unable to answer, he/she develops a sense of shame and doubt about his/her  own abilities, and  you end up hurting the child’s self worth for life

When you interview a 4 to 5 year old and the child is unable to answer he/she  develops a sense of guilt that ‘I let my parents down and I am worthless’,  and so this child will never take initiatives in life

When you interview a 6 years and above child and if the child is unable to answer he/she develops an inferiority complex and zero self worth.

How else does interviewing harm children?-

It makes the children scared, nervous, frightened, terrified, and edgy, all these are negative emotions and negative emotions bring to fore the ‘fight or flight’ tendency of the brain. So either the child feels like hiding behind the parent, or bawls his/her head off, or acts aggressive and throws a tantrum

Negative emotions also release ‘bad chemicals’ in the brain which affect learning and memory.

 This kind of unnerving experience also leaves a long lasting wound on the child’s personality and the child can get scared of meeting strangers, or learn to avoid going to places with the parent.

In many children the whole experience leads to nail biting, tantrums, upset tummy, fever and bed wetting. Nail biting and bed wetting are vicious cycles, once entered into can cause a long term burden on the child.

After Reading all the above should children be interviewed?

ABSOLUTELY NOT!

Here is a quote-

Sam Meisels (HEAD START PROGRAM) offers these tips-

·       Young children should never be challenged during assessments by being separated from their parents or familiar caregivers.

·        An unfamiliar examiner should never assess young children.

·    Assessments that are limited to areas that are easily measurable, such as certain motor or cognitive skills should not be considered complete.

·         Formal tests or tools should not be the cornerstone of an assessment of an infant or young child.

LETS JOIN HANDS AND BANISH ‘INTERVIEWS’ FROM THE LIVES OF PRESCHOOLERS, LETS INSTEAD START INTERVIEWING THE PEOPLE WHO ‘INTERVIEW’ KIDS, LETS FIND OUT WHY THEY DO IT. LETS WORK FOR HEALTHY PRECHOOL EDUCATION IN INDIA.

DO JOIN US ON www.eca-india.org

When You Thought I Wasn't Looking or I Didnt Understand

Unravelling the mystery of a healthy childhood.

Health is every one’s quest in life. Parents want to be healthy; they want their kids to be healthy. So is health all about food, exercise? Or is health a lifestyle that you teach your kids about?

The true secret of health and a healthy lifelong lifestyle is ‘keeping it simple’. We need to gift our kids simple everyday essential things to ensure that they remain healthy in mind, body and soul.

THE GIFT OF SIMPLE FOOD: The complexity of competition, stress, fast pace and chemical-laced lifestyle that we have got so used to giving our kids, needs to be shown the back door. When was the last time you really asked your child what he wants you to cook? And then actually gave him that without changing his choice to suit your convenience? Worried that your child will ask you for pizza? Great! Put on a chef’s cap for both of you—drag the dad if possible—wear an apron and start preparing a homemade pizza, with veggies, cheese, and wheat base.

Pack away all the excuses like- ‘I am a working mom’, ‘I don’t have time’, ‘My child does not like the food I cook’, ‘He loves packaged food’, ‘I don’t get time’ etc. This weekend cook a wholesome meal for your child, of his/her choice, with your child helping you if possible. Its okay if he/she drips, drops, spoils your million rupees designer kitchen! Then sit down and enjoy the meal together. See the smile spread on his/her face.

All that packaged food that we tend to give our children has additives and chemicals which are harmful for health. Moreover they have a higher salt content which can lead to early problems of high blood pressure and heart diseases. Scientific studies have shown that many of the additives can cause attention deficit problems and research on cancer has also shown that cancer cells thrive in conditions of high salt and sugar content.

THE SIMPLE GIFT OF WATER: Throw out all the soft drink, tetra juice packs and let your child drink water. Resist the urge to flavour it with sugar or additives. Just pure, simple, unadulterated water- the gift of a life time. Water has oxygen and oxygen is good for blood circulation and blood circulation keeps the brain alert and active. An active brain is good for intelligence. Intelligent children become achievers. Phew! Isn’t that what you want? Then stop listening to all those silly ads that claim that ‘this drink gives your child glucose’ and ‘this drink gives your child brain food’ etc, etc. Keep It Simple Silly. Drink water… together. It’s more fun!

THE SIMPLE GIFT OF PLAY: Buy your child toys, not gadgets! Yes, computer games, video games, even battery-operated toys are not toys. They are gadgets or rather monster toys. Why would you want to gift your child a monster? Your child is intelligent, active, sharp and can solve all video games? Then it means that your child needs toys that stimulate and challenge and as Vygotsky, the Russian educationist said, your child needs to reach ZPD - the Zone of Proximal Development.

Take your child to the next level of play, take him/her from what he/she can do to what he/she finds a challenge to do. This will stimulate interest, keep your child occupied, enhance thinking and problem solving and improve attention abilities and at the same time relax and calm your child. No video games can do all this. Video games teach children to win at any cost, to drive yourself to defeat others, kill others, destroy others. Video games make children aggressive, irritable and restless. Video games (computers, mobile games, play station all included) make children violent and more prone to stress-related diseases.

Keep It Simple Silly. This X’mas, gift your child toys: intricate jigsaws, board games, a cycle, a sports kit, a make-it-yourself kit. Don’t just buy… think, relate to your child’s interest, search and buy.

THE GIFT OF 'NO T.V. LAND': Analyse the kind of television programs

your child is watching with you. A serial in which the protagonist is being raped, sold to a brothel? A wife having an extra-marital affair or a wife plotting to kill her husband? Or worse, a husband plotting against his family, having a mistress…. God! Is this what our kids are watching? Night after night? Sitting with their parents? At an age when they cannot distinguish between reality and fantasy? All this will affect their emotional development.

As well known child psychoanalyst Erik Erikson had said in his theory of emotional development, ‘They will learn to mistrust, they will develop low self esteem and will also develop self-doubt’. Young children are developing moral values at that age and if they are exposed to such immoral and unethical concepts then what will happen to the ethical structure of society?

This weekend switch off the television. Ouch! Even the thought is difficult? Okay, then at least switch it off at dinner and together time. No television droning in the background while you help your child with homework, or are playing a board game. Take a pledge that no family drama soaps or reality shows that make children the ‘bali ka bakra’ will be viewed in your home. Can’t stay without it? Then buy a television system in which you can record programs and then watch them when your child is not at home! Keep It Simple Silly. Make your own entertainment.

THE GIFT OF 'SIMPLY SLEEP': ‘It’s time to go to bed,’ was what

traditional parents would say, and then the mother or father would bathe the child (a warm water bath helps relax muscles and relaxed children sleep faster) while talking to the child  about his/her day (bonding time with the parents helps the child develop positive self esteem)  put on fresh night clothes for the child, (fresh clothes help children relax, and helps the skin breathe) tuck him in bed, read him a story or sing him a lullaby and then as the child’s eyes slowly drooped shut, the parent would kiss them on the forehead, whisper complementary sentences like, my sweet girl, my brave boy, my good child etc (positive motivation just before bed time helps work on the child’s confidence and self esteem) and leave the child to sleep peacefully at nine o’clock at night! Sounds like a fantasy right? Do gift your child this fantasy instead of the horror of being told to ‘Go brush your teeth, while I watch this important serial’, ‘Now go and wear your pyjamas and come and sit with me on the sofa while I watch my favourite serial’ and then the child falls asleep on the sofa with a television set shrilling away violent dialogues or gory war images or sobs of soap heroines. This isn’t lovely background music for your child to sleep in. No wonder your child wakes up in the middle of the night with nightmares or bed wets or has a fitful night and is dull or irritable in the morning and drowsy in school. Brain research says that sleep time is when the brain organises information collected in the daytime. When the child’s brain does not get enough sleep then the child can suffer from inability to retain facts, get confused, forget information easily and chronic sleep deprivation also leads to irritability violence and inattentiveness. Keep It Simple Silly - make your child a ‘sleeping beauty’!

So, when you gift wrap all these simple gifts together, then you will be gifting your child the most precious gift: A safe, healthy, love-filled childhood and a fantastic life ahead. If all these simple gifts sound difficult to do on a daily basis, then at least gift this to them on weekends!