Monday, 5 August 2013

The new rage among adolescents, motor bike stunts



Rash driving- it is important to understand that when youngsters are indulging in rash and illegal driving then the elements involved are not only rashness but also recklessness, a thrill of adrenalin, excitement, the need to be ‘faster’ or the need for speed, and of course peer imitation, ‘others are doing it why not me?’. Worse still is knocking down someone and not stopping to help or even feeling remorseful about it.

What does all the above say about the mindset and personalities of our young generation? Let’s understand each one-

Recklessness- is part of taking risks, but one must know good risks and bad risks. And for kids to know the difference we need to nurture logical intelligence. Risk management is an important skill that can be part of education both in schools and at home. A simple exercise for risk management which you can start as young as  age 5 is asking hypothetical questions to children and then understanding their mindsets with their answers and moulding their way of thinking by showing them the pros and cons. Try questions like what if clouds had strings? You will notice , the answers you will first receive will all be positive and almost selfish in nature like we can swing on them, we can pull the clouds towards ourselves we can, take a cloud along like a balloon, etc.  After  eliciting these answers you then need to focus your kid’s  attention by asking queries like,   ‘some people will take all the clouds above them and get all the rain, is that right?’. ‘What would happen to birds if clouds had strings?’ ‘What would happen to aeroplanes if clouds had strings?’    Now end the exercise by asking, ‘Should clouds have strings?’
 An exercise in thinking like the above helps develop the logical intelligence, the individual learns to look at both the pros and cons and not get carried away only with the pros. This should start from childhood.

A thrill of adrenalin or excitement- this means that maybe the everyday activities of the child are boring and lack excitement and that is why they search out such activities that give them that rush and surge of doing something. Good chance for both parents and educationists to look within.

Being faster, well can we blame the youngsters? - Speed is something that we praise in children and we are constantly goading children to be faster, first etc. Hence the concept of speed gets ingrained quite early in life in a child’s mind as synonymous to success. Rarely do they associate speed with danger. Also as much as it is parents responsibility that they do not allow their young children to drive or buy them a car etc it is equally the responsibility of the media and the bike  companies to see that their product is not incorrectly portrayed to young impressionable minds. Look at all the television ads of all leading motorbikes or cars; each one is showing off stunts, racing, taking risks. These are bikes and cars  that will actually be used on roads with potholes and at a speed not more than 30 kms an hour and even less keeping in mind the traffic in most places, but see their ads, they are zooming, performing stunts and motivating the young buyer to try it out. In this initiative against rash driving why don’t we send a rose to each of these bike and car companies and each of the ad companies that made the ad and make them realise their responsibility towards society, if nothing else they should think of it as their corporate social responsibility.


They feel a sense of immense confidence when they race or drive recklessly- Adolescence is a phase that requires constant booster doses of confidence building. But sadly at that stage the adolescent has the maximum stress of performance and physically they are going through a ‘gangly’ stage.  Emotionally also they lack the confidence. What adds to it is when parents and teachers are also more critical and use ‘put me down language’. Boost the young adult’s confidence, show him/her success in activities that he/she is good at and surely instances of young adults seeking confidence boosters from such rash activities would go down.

Peer imitation- parents need to be extremely conscious about who the youngster is friendly with, call them home, meet them and then discuss with your youngster if you notice some mindsets in their  friends which are completely different from that of your family. Don’t stop them from meeting such varied mindsets but make your youngster understand that to be successful in life it is not always beneficial to conform and imitate, to be a leader one must be able to stand differently and successfully. Also important here is that children should grow up seeing and hearing you talk about your heroes, your role model and then help them seek out their hero and role model. Till childhood most boys look up to superman and spider man but what happens in adolescent, who is their role model?

What does it tell us when such youngsters race and knock down someone and do not even stop to help? When the upbringing of children lacks enough of emphasis on empathy development and conscience development then as youngsters they will be ruthless and uncaring. Both the home and educational institutions must consciously develop this otherwise we are headed for a very mean, selfish and uncaring society.

So who is to blame for this reckless driving? R.T.O for giving licenses? Cops that turn a blind eye when they see an underage driving? Parents who gift their underage children a vehicle too soon? Or friends and media? The answer is truly in the famous African proverb- ‘It Takes a Village to Raise a Child’. Yes, ‘It Takes A Community To Raise A Youngster’. So his friends, your friends, his peer group, the magazines and TV channels that he watches, the police, the government are all responsible.  They all contribute to your child’s mindset. Where do we begin? Charity begins for each one of the above at home. Let’s stop blaming, finding faults, let the change begin.

And yes a final word of caution, please do not sit your young toddler on your lap when you are driving, think about it, are you not sowing the seeds of ‘too fast, too soon’? Better be safe than sorry.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

This article truly depicts the current craze with teenagers and the reasons for them to resort to such violent road rage. It is healthy and important to be friends with your children but its equally important to teach them how to be safe themselves and be responsible for the safety of others...The recent bike stunt case in Delhi in which a teenager was shot down by the police should be an eye opener for all parents and yes as truly said by you ma'am charity should begin at home,let the home front bring about the much needed change and give the society responsible and law abiding generation next...

Anonymous said...

The motor bike stunt incident at Delhi has opened a eye of many parents & they need to understand that teenagers look grown-up long, long before they're truly adults. And in the period when they can look 25, but sometimes behave like 2.5 year olds, you have to negotiate the path of how much freedom you let them have, how much you treat them as adults, and when you have to lay down the law and remind them what the rules are. What they need is parents positive attention .

jayshree shah said...

your article is an eye opener for every one and most importantly to realize where we are going wrong, its right time to understand better be late then never.

Anonymous said...

This article is an eye opener for parents and society at large. As the article states no one is to be blamed separately as everyone has added their part for such a situation. Children who behave properly are teased by elders. An incidence came to my mind as I read this article, in our society when I was going out for a walk a boy was walking on the road to school, one of our society member stopped him and asked "why are you walking" he said "my father is out of station, hence I am walking". the elderly person without thinking for a second said "you should then take your father's vehicle to school". the boy replied "uncle I am not yet 18 and I do not hold a license, how can I take the vehicle" for which the elderly person replied "who is going to check you here,just take and go". the boy smiled and walked off for which the elderly person states," you do not know to enjoy life". It is sadly true that society believes such things as enjoyment.

Arwah Dalal said...

Todays Mumbai mirror paper also has an accident where a teenager lost his life due to rash driving.Today's generation donTt see the risks and want to compete with friends and want a thrill in their lives. parents too sometimes pride in saying that my son is 17 and driving the car or bike.Education needs to begin at home and life will be easier.So many accident deaths happening will reduce.

Unknown said...

This increasing rage and trend among adolescents is i think majorly due to their NEED of PROVING oneself to others.
Thus as parents , whose influence is right from birth needs to work on with the child to build a POSITIVE SELF IMAGE . This would encompass instilling qualities which would bring about a sensible, balanced and self confident adolsecent and thus making he adolescent make the right choices.
Pressure and getting influenced will always be there, but getting pressured or influenced is after all in our own hands.
Thus we as parents, teachers need to work towards making our ROOTS strong and other things will become simpler for the child on his way ahead.

Unknown said...

This article is helpful for crazy teenagers and all parent too. This is our duty to teach children control emotions and learning patience from their childhood only. If they will start thinking for others they will not do things carelessly like driving. It's important to remember 'Live and let live'. Of course we have right to enjoy our life in our way; but that way should not hurt neither others nor us.

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