Learning
for educators and parents from Padmavati film row and Miss World win.
Media
has been going berserk on the Padmavati film row, with arguments and shouting
matches by those who support the film and those who don’t! And in this frenzy
came the news about our girl from Haryana winning the Miss World crown and
bringing it back to India after 17 years by replying, ‘mother’, to the end of
the pageant question- ‘Which profession should be the highest paid and why?’
And her reply again has those that think it was an apt reply and those that
don’t.
Both
the news are splashed everywhere, so much so that it is difficult to ignore
them and kids, especially youngsters are definitely influenced by both the
news. This is where we as educators need to step in and help them analyze,
deliberate and decide otherwise they will end up taking sides without learning
the most essential skills of logical thinking so required in understanding
conflict. If we really want to change our education system then its time
to start discussing contemporary issues with students. Discussing not arguing
or judging!
Our
children and youth have a question regarding the Padmavati film row- ‘Who is
right?’ Many educators and mothers applauded the reply given by Ms. Chillar to
clinch the crown, and our students have a question, ‘She did not answer the
question, so will we also be applauded if we don’t answer questions in the
right context?’
The
Padmavati film row is the right opportunity to teach our children and youth the
following-
1. There is never a
complete right and wrong in such conflicts, the important part is resolving the
conflict to the benefit of both parties and without any harm to a third party.
Discussions
are raging about proving each side wrong or each side right but we must realize
that in this situation like many such conflicts there is no innocent party or
the right and wrong party as both parties have broken rules and have erred. The
choice now is either to continue to argue that this party is less guilty or
more violent than the other or to ensure that both parties are brought face to
face to resolve the conflict. Youth need our help to understand how media also
has two sides, the ‘reporting’ and the ‘rehashing’, it is the rehashing that we
need to be careful about and train our children to understand that it happens
for TRP and once they understand the difference they will be able to make
logical choices instead of depending on the ‘brain washing’ of the rehashing!
2.
Creative liberty or
liberty of speech is our right but we also have to respect the right of beliefs
and sentiments.
We
are a proud democratic country and we have the right to speak our mind, our
thoughts and practice creativity. But with every right, comes a responsibility
and it is this combination that we need to make our children and youth aware
about. What they speak and how they speak can hurt someone’s beliefs and
sentiments, are they aware of the same? Or are they clueless about the same? Or
are they aware but choose to ignore the same? This requires intelligence,
sensitivity and empathy, all signs of a good leader. So help students to
analyze their decisions, thoughts, and speech on these guidelines before they
decide to speak, print or go public.
3.
Tackling upset people
by becoming more upset with them does not diffuse the situation. What helps is
knowledge of conflict resolution.
Our
children need to be given the understanding that Violence can never be condoned
and any kind of violence is deplorable. But violence cannot be defused by
sarcasm, mocking or shouting. Violence happens when the thinking brain has
stopped thinking and is now on flight or fight mode. The more you shout,
threaten or mock such a brain it will resort to more violence as it is on ‘shut
down mode’. The only way to calm violence is to bring in conflict resolution.
This needs to be practiced at the micro level by teachers in schools and
parents at home by not resorting to violence when tackling an angry child or
teenager or by shouting and mocking their behavior. This will only ignite and
incite them to do more bad behavior. If children see adults handling a volatile
situation in a clam manner and succeeding in diffusing the same then they will
grow up learning conflict resolution skills that will go a long way in ensuring
that they become law abiding citizens that contribute to a peaceful society and
world. Our children will face violence in the form of bullies and bullies
cannot be done away with more bullying! Conflict resolution is a 21st
century life skill that we need to ingrain and pass on to our youth.
The
Miss World win is the perfect opportunity to help young impressionable minds
understand the following:
1.
Ms. Chillar is a young
budding medical student, so she is a perfect example of beauty and brains. In
today’s world it is important to understand the meaning of beauty is not just
in being born with great looks but making yourself beautiful with exercise, a good
food plan and grooming. All that is possible for everyone. And the earlier we
make them aware of the same is better. Healthy food should not be confused with
dieting and exercise should not become exercise binging! Grooming is all about
health and hygiene.
2.
So what is a good
figure? Will be a common topic of discussion in young boys and girls, well, its
time to help them understand that a good figure is one that makes you feel
comfortable and healthy. Going on life threatening diets or severe gym plans
is only a temporary and dangerous solution.
3.
Even in a beauty
pageant the clincher is always the question and answer round, so you may win
all the beauty and fashion rounds but it is your presence of mind, confidence and
smartness that ultimately gets you the crown or keeps it at arms length from
you. This helps children understand that nothing in life is dependent on just
good looks!
But
a teenager asked me the most important queries on the question Ms. Chillar was
asked and the reply she gave, the query, ‘Was her reply correct?’, to
which I said well she did not answer the question but replied to it in a
different context. Because after the entire question posed was, ‘Which
profession should be paid the highest salary and why?’ and the meaning of the
word profession is - a paid occupation, especially one that involves
prolonged training and a formal qualification. So yes her reply, ‘Mother’ is
not the apt reply to the question but she smartly gave it a different context
and thus won the heart of the jury.
And
now the teenager asked me a second question- ‘So should not schools also allow
us to answer questions in a different context? Why do they insist on having a
right answer…only one answer?’
And
this is what I leave to all educators and parents to think about, especially
those that are applauding Ms. Chillar’s reply, why cant we give our students
the same freedom when it comes to replying to questions that can have more than
one context?
Its
time we used contemporary everyday affairs to help us teach our students and
children so that they are better equipped to face the world and its trails and
tribulations on their own with confidence, zeal, determination and logic.
Dr.Swati
Popat Vats
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